Stupid
by Tenshi no Yupiteru
Summary: SMxHP: no senshi, before HBP. Oneshot. MakotoxSirius. She loved him more than anything since the death of her parents, but when he dies, she transfer that love to raising a baby girl, named Yuri.


**Stupid**

_Night lift up the shades _

Light crept into the room decorated in shades of green through a slanted skylight in the ceiling. As the room slowly filled with light, a groan was heard from the person tucked underneath the layers of the queen-sized bed.

_Let in the brilliant light of morning _

Reaching out, a cream colored hand peeked out of the covers searching the other side of the bed and found nothing. Moving around and managing to throw the covers out of the way, a brunette female sat up in the bed, emerald eyes filled with sadness as she pulled her bent legs towards her chest. As she rested her head on the top of her knees, she caught sight of a crumpled piece of paper on top of the pillow next to hers.

_But steady there now _

Before he left after every visit, he wrote her a note and placed it on the pillow he usually slept on. He done this when they dated in school at Hogwarts and even now, when they were married. It felt weird to be the only eighteen-year-old to married in Juuban, but she thought nothing of it as she looked down at the simple gold wedding band he had bought her. Turning around, she smiled at it lovingly - thinking of him.

_For I am weak and starving for mercy _

Sighing, Makoto's emerald eyes landed back on the note. She knew that she didn't have to read the note to know what it said, but she opened it anyways to skim its contents. As usual, he had yet another 'job' in England, she liked to call them missions, to finish and wouldn't be able to come back for Christmas this year.

_  
Sleep has left me alone _

A sob escaped her mouth as she realized that he only wrote Christmas because he didn't want to say that he would miss her birthday as well. Throwing the note in the garbage can beside the nightstand, she crawled out of bed and made her way towards the shower, preparing for another uneventful day at work.

_  
To carry the weight of unraveling where we went wrong _

As Makoto returned from her busy day at her restaurant, she slipped off her shoes, hung up her coat and tossed her keys into a small crystal dish before heading straight to her bathroom. Stripping down, she turned on the water for the tub and let her down from its ponytail.

_  
It's all I can do to hang on _

Slipping into the brimming tub, she let the water wash away the stress of the day, the little things she had panicked about and her worrying for her boyfriend and his new 'job'. Her emerald eyes now revealed all of her pent up sadness as she hugged her legs to her chest. Repeating her mantra in her head:

_  
To keep me from falling _

'_I'm not going to cry. I'm not going to cry… I'm a big girl. I can do this… I have since he started picking up weird jobs… Siri… I miss you… come back safely…'_

_Into old familiar shoes _

So Makoto waited. For the six months he was gone for this 'job' of his and she hadn't received a word of anything from him.

_How stupid could I be _

Flipping to her left side after hearing the alarm go off, she groaned as the clock read '5:42 a.m.' in bright red lights after she smacked the alarm for the third time that morning. Rolling over to face his side of the bed, she realized that it was her birthday… the day before Christmas… and she would celebrate it alone - again. A lone tear trekked down her face and she immediately held back the rest that she knew would come pouring down if she didn't control them now.

_  
A simpleton could see _

Shaking herself from the depressing state that was taking her over, she yanked the alarm out of the wall and went back to sleep. When she re-awoke three hours later and climbed out of bed, she smiled to herself as she drew back the curtains to the windows and saw snow decorating the city in a blanket of cold. She pulled on her favorite sweatshirt and pair of her husband's boxers before making their bed.

_  
That you're no good for me _

Makoto was surprised when she heard a the jingling of the door open, signifying that someone had either broken in or had a key to her and Sirius's apartment. Eyes narrowed and her pulled her wand out of the sleeve of her sweatshirt, creeping silently to the entrance of her apartment.

_  
But you're the only one I see _

Her eyes landed on a rather rough figure pacing back and forth muttering things under their breath. She was still hiding in the hallway of the apartment and scrunched up her nose in disgust at the smell the person was leaving her living room. Moving closer to the living room, Makoto's eyes widened when she recognized the figure as her husband when she heard him muttered something about "them" capturing her.

_Love has made me a fool _

"Siri?" - her voice cracked.

_It set me on fire and watched as I floundered _

It was definitely Sirius Black as he swiftly turned around with his wand out and pointed at her. The wand cluttered to the floor as soon as he saw Makoto standing in the hallway with a tattered sweatshirt on and a pair of his boxers on. His voice was hoarse as he spoke her name. "Mako?"

_Unable to speak _

They met half way between where they had been standing. She cupped his face and placed butterfly kisses all over his face, not bothering to ask why he was dirty nor why had bristles growing around his face. He pulled her fully up against him, calloused hands running up and down her back gently. When Sirius slowly pulled away, his soft, dark blue eyes searched over her as he asked, "They didn't hurt you, did they?"

_Except to cry out and wait for your answer _

"Who's they, Siri? What are you talking about?" Makoto asked, her voice full of confusion as her emerald eyes racked over his face, searching for a clue. Her husband suddenly broke down as he pulled his wife back into his embrace.

_But you come around in your time _

He pulled her back into their bedroom and sat her down on the bed before he began pacing again, tears still running down his angular face and running a hand through his unruly and jagged black hair. Sirius suddenly kneeled in front of her and clasped both of her hands between his.

_  
Speaking of fabulous places _

"Mako…" his deep baritone voice threatened to break, but he regained control. "I really didn't want to return to you on your birthday like this… I feel that you need to know what's been going on for the six months."

_  
Create an oasis _

Emerald and sapphire orbs bore into the other, emerald full of worry and concern and sapphire filled with sadness and despair. "I told you about Jamie and Lil's wedding, right, babe?"

_  
Dries up as soon as you're gone _

Makoto nodded. "And how they had a baby boy, Harry, right?"

_You leave me here burning _

Again, she nodded - what did this have to do with why he was so tense and sobbing like a tiny baby?

_  
In this desert without you _

"They're dead. Lily… she and James… were murdered… by Lord Voldemort. Remus, Peter, James, Dumbledore and I were trying to find the best way to protect them from that bastard. I was supposed to play as the Potter's secret keeper, while we decided that Peter would make the best secret keeper out of the four of us." Sirius looked down at their hands. "How stupid we were. That bloody traitor ratted us out to Voldemort and now… they're dead… Worst of all, that damn rat made it look like I murdered them and the people in street! Now the Ministry is after me, babe. Harry… thank God he's alive and safe, but he's living with his bloody aunt and uncle in England. I… God, I'm so sorry, babe. I didn't mean to spoil your birthday. What a horrible husband I am… Mako?"

_How stupid could I be _

Makoto sat with a blank face on their bed. James? Lily? Dead… Lord Voldemort? Peter? Harry? Her eyes filled with tears as the truth sunk into her veins - they were going to take her husband from her because Peter had set him up. As the first tear fell down her face, Sirius wiped it away and pulled her into his embrace. He shed his tattered robe and tossed it on the floor before gently picking up his sobbing wife and sitting on the bed, tenderly holding her as they both broken heartily cried for their loss. She pulled away and sat back on her calves, emerald orbs begging him to stay. Makoto cupped his face again as his hands rested on her hips. "Siri… they're… don't leave me… Siri…"

_  
A simpleton could see _

Sirius Black pulled his sobbing wife closer and captured her lips, savoring his last moments with her. He gently flipped her underneath him while their lips were locked and covered her shaking body with his warm body. She reached up and ran her fingers through his sticky locks, but didn't care because she was with her husband. They slowly got caught up in the heat of the moment and began pulling off clothes as they covered each other with tender caresses and sweet kisses, passionately making love in possibly their last moments of being together.

_  
That you're no good for me _

As the streams of light entered their room the next morning, Makoto inched slower to the heat emanating from the other side of the bed. As she came in contact with flesh, she rubbed her emerald eyes from sleep and saw her husband sleeping peacefully despite everything that had happened. She rested her head against his chiseled chest and wrapped her arms around his waist. She felt one of his arms snake around her and pull her as close as possible against him.

"I love you, Mako," he murmured in her ear. She smiled as he pulled back and opened his deep blue eyes and pecked her on the cheek. "I love you too Siri…"

_  
But you're the only one I see _

Twelve years had passed since Sirius Black had been taken into custody and convicted - without a trail - as the murderer of Lily and James Potter. Makoto had spent those years dating guys to please her friends, but never bothered with any of them and carefully began to build up other restaurants and café in Japan. She hadn't believed any of the stories and was extremely surprised to find out that he had escaped from Azkaban. She didn't know why he had, how he had or why he had, but she was blown away by the simple fact that he had managed to escape.

_Everything changes _

Three months later, she was visit by Sirius, who was looked like a walking lamp post and Prussian blue eyes haunted, but he was still her husband. Makoto instanced upon feeding him and taking care of him until he left again and he instanced upon telling her about Azkaban - every story made her shudder in horror - and he told her about escaping as well as seeing Harry, Remus and Peter. He told her about wanting to get custody of Harry and take him away from those "bloody relatives of his mother's" and she agreed. At the end, they again made love to each other like they never would again and from their love, grew a bundle of joy that Sirius would never know.

_  
Everything falls apart _

He left back for England to get custody of Harry, but he constantly wrote to her. It comforted her to know he was doing well, despite his living arrangements. She never mentioned that she was pregnant, for fear that the letter would end up in the wrong hands, but had hinted at it. Makoto was never sure if he got the hidden message, but hoped that he had.

_Can't stand to feel myself losing control _

Barely over a year later and after the birth of a healthy baby girl named Yuri, Makoto received news from Remus, who - she found out - Sirius had informed about their marriage and where she was living. She had burst out in tears of agony and melancholy when she found that Sirius had been killed during a fight inside a veil with his cousin, Bellatrix Lestrange.

_  
But deep in my senses I know _

Feeling abandoned, she struggled to keep going and caring for her growing baby. She focused all her energy on nurturing for the young girl who seemed to take after her father with her sense of stubbornness in doing things her own way. Makoto decided to resume the fight that Sirius had started for custody of Harry, knowing that it what Sirius would have wanted.

_  
How stupid could I be _

When Yuri was old enough to fly - three years old - Makoto had saved up enough money to fly over to England to talk to Albus Dumbledore about the death of her husband and whether or not she could get custody of her godson, Harry Potter. She packed enough clothes and supplies for the two and half week stay in London and they took off.

Once they arrived in London Airport and gathered their belongings, Makoto took the Knight Bus to the Leaky Cauldron and went into Diagon Alley and rented a hotel room for the two and half weeks they would be staying there.

She quickly changed into appropriate clothes to visit a graveyard, hid her wand in the sleeve of her robes. She picked up the sleeping girl and a daycare bag for any emergencies along the way. She locked the door to her hotel and decided to walk through Diagon Alley.

_A simpleton could see _

Makoto sighed as she felt her heart become heavy as she walked through the bustling Diagon Alley. Parents and students of Hogwarts were running about to purchase school supplies for the upcoming year and she stumbled into an old friend, Remus Lupin.

"Remus?" she softly asked, her English still thick of her Japanese accent. "Is that you?"

The golden eyed man immediately looked up after apologizing for bumping into her and a smile broke out on his hardened face. "Hello Makoto. It's been quite a long time, old friend. How have you been?"

A sad smile graced the brunette mother's face as she shifted the sleeping girl in her arms. "I've been better… but I'm doing well. How about you?"

Remus nodded as he looked at the sleeping brown haired cherub, "I've been reassigned the post of being Professor of Defense Against the Dark Arts this year at Hogwarts. When did you get here? How is your businesses in Japan going?"

"I got in this morning. My restaurants are coming along great. I'm -"

**"REMUS! HEY, REMUS!"** came a yell from over the hordes of people, causing little Yuri to be disturbed from her slumber and rub her eyes. Once she saw Remus, she buried her face back into Makoto's robes. Makoto smiled, "She's really shy."

_That you're no good for me _

Three teens stumbled upon the two. One red haired lanky male with hazel eyes, a bushy brown haired girl about the same age with sparkling chocolate eyes and a black haired boy with glasses and deep green eyes.

"Excuse us, madam," the girl said, "we didn't mean to interrupt your conversation."

Makoto smiled. "It's quite alright, dear. Well, Remus, it was nice to -"

The lanky thirty-three-year-old man shook his head. "Let me introduce you before you head off, Mako. This is Ronald Wealsey, Hermione Granger and Harry Potter. They're in their seventh year at Hogwarts. Ron, Hermione, Harry, I'd like you to meet Makoto Black. We're old friends from school."

"It's nice to meet you three," Makoto said. "I would shake hands with you, but my daughter just woke up from her nap."

_But you're the only one I see _

Harry's emerald eyes gazed at her in shock, "Black? Are you Sirius's sister?"

A sad smile came over her face as she replied. "No, dear. I'm Sirius's wife. This is our daughter, Yuri. She's going to be four at the end of the week."

_How stupid could I be _

The little girl finally moved her attention from the bustling people behind her mother to the teens. All four were taken back by the striking resemblance of eyes to those of Sirius's. She gurgled at them before tugging on her mother's rose earring. Makoto smiled down at Yuri.

"Aren't her eyes pretty? They remind me of Sirius," she murmured longingly. Looking back up, she smiled and said, "You'll have to excuse us. We have to visit Sirius's grave. See you later…"

_A simpleton could see _

Remus grabbed his deceased friend's wife's arm and tucked a piece of paper into her pocket. "Call me if you need anything, alright?"

Makoto nodded before the turned and left, but she did hear Ron ask Remus how Sirius had a child with her. She sadly smiled to herself as she remembered how her baby girl was conceived.

_That you're no good for me _

When they finally reached the end of Diagon Alley, she made a quick turn to her left and opened the gate to the graveyard. Making sure no one was following her, she closed the gate and headed towards the back where she knew all the members of Black family had been buried.

"Hello Siri…" her voice cracked and she gently placed a curious Yuri on her feet. Yuri leaned down and touched the ceramic plaque with 'Sirius Black: 1972 - 2004' engraved onto with her chubby hands. Smiling, she righted herself, looked up at Makoto with innocent Prussian blue eyes. Pointed to it, she chirped, "Dada!"

Makoto nodded as her emerald eyes filled with tears as she squatted to her daughter's height. "That's right Yuri. That's your dada. He loves us very much."

The brunette smiled as she picked up the young girl and placed Yuri on her left hip. Touching her daughter's nose, she asked her, "Did you tell your dada that you love him?"

"I wuv you, dada," the little girl announced loudly. Makoto smiled, "Now say bye."

Yuri waved to the plaque, "Bye-bye!"

Makoto smiled and softly murmured, "I love you, Siri. We'll be back." And she heard Sirius's voice respond, "I love you too Mako. And Yuri too."

_But you're the only one I see _

Neither where aware of the four people that had followed them into the graveyard, but it didn't matter.

"Stupid" by Sarah McLachlan.

I don't own anything but the plot and words with which I wrote this story.

I do not know whether or not there is a graveyard in Diagon Alley, I just included one.


End file.
